The House That Built Me

     I have been lucky enough to have never experienced a close one passing in my lifetime. It will, of course, one day occur, but the longer it is delayed the better. However, I certainly have dealt with a few major losses in my lifetime whether it has to do with a friendship coming to an end, a relationship breaking up, or losing an object that had great sentimental value to me.
     In my life, nothing hurt me so much as to see the unraveling of my parents marriage.  I rarely saw my father anymore, who moved two hours away. To make matters worse, my mother's family convinced her to relocate to Florida, dragging me and my brothers along. I left my childhood home, and along with it, my childhood. So I did not lose a person, except for not seeing my father as often, but rather I lost the home I grew up in, an important part of me.
     I lived the first fifteen years of my life in Norfolk, Massachusetts. The house was robin's egg green, before eventually being painted white, with a barn built by my father in the backyard. It was a small cape-style home, on about one acre of land, and it might not seem like much to most people, but to me it means so much. I can still recall so vividly the countless starry nights I spent swimming in the pool, with bats fluttering overhead. Every memory I made in that home seems like a separate lifetime. Since leaving, I have never been able to find a house that felt like my true "home". I have moved six times in the past 5 years, but none of those places felt right. I miss my neighborhood more than anything. My next door neigbors were my cousins, and next to them lived my great grandmother, Gram. Gram owned the woods behind all three of our houses so it was like a little family compound.
     About a half mile down the road you would find my favorite place in the entire world. Stony Brook is a place I would walk to often. I loved to go in the Spring to watch the Geese with their adorable goslings in tow. There is a place there that I will always remember as the best spot in the reservation. Down a walkway is a waterfall leading to a brook that year after year ducks will raise their families. It honestly is such an amazing place. My sister went to Stony Brook after her wedding for pictures, which makes the place that much more special.
     There was never a dull moment growing up there. When I was in 3rd grade I took a baby chicken home from school. Within a few years...one little chick turned into thirty full grown chickens! (We bought more, of course). It was great to have unlimited free eggs all the time.
     Miranda Lambert is one of my favorite country musicians. One of her songs truly touched my heart. Her beautiful song, "The House That Built Me" brings tears to my eyes when I hear it. It reminds me so much of my childhood, and the only house I have ever been able to call my home.

"If I could just come in I swear I’ll leave
Won’t take nothing but a memory
From the house that built me"

-Miranda Lambert

      I drive by the house often, and when I do I sometimes wish I could knock on the door and take a step inside and recall the memories of my youth. All of the family Christmases, Thanksgivings, Halloweens, I'd like to relive again. I can still smell the scent of the freshly cut grass on a Summer's day just after my mother chugged along on her ride along mower. I would trade anything to be able to go back to those carefree days, to enjoy the decade and a half I spent there all over again. As time presses on, I am reminded that all things must change, and eventually draw to an end.

"The only constant in life, is change"

-Heraclitus